No one ever knows what will trigger our bodies to turn against themselves, and when it might happen. Clearly there are a multitude of approaches which could be taken to battle cancer, one of which is: wait and see. Watch and wait for symptoms.
Radiation has been done. Fatigue will definitely be a side effect (wow, has that one caught me by surprise), as we await signs of whether the radiation treatment takes effect. In that, it means that the tumours in my spine which have metastasized start to shrink and allow me to have some mobility back. I AM seeing some movement in my right leg – which has been fun and encouraging to watch!
Regarding the fatigue thing, one minute I will be sitting there eating a meal, visiting or trying to write a blog such as this one, and the next minute my head will lay down slightly on the pillow and I just can’t seem able to open my mouth long enough to say two words and I ‘crash’. I find these moments really overwhelming and scary, as I can’t comprehend how this body could have possibly been playing hard-core beach volleyball in the sands of Panama, directly in front of Bahia Resort where I was living in bliss just one month ago!!
This body that used to work so hard at finding the perfect places for expats such as myself to simply relocate for a more conducive lifestyle which is more suitable to their dreams, live out their retirement, relocate their families, escape the cold winters, the taxes etc. to which they were growing less and less content with, or to simply try out a ‘different place to live’ than where they grew up, which is no longer wanting to function for them. I truly loved what I did. However, now I lay here, wondering if I will ever walk again, whether I will live to see the next month – or six. Will I see my next birthday or Christmas? My children get married? A grandchild be born?
Never will I blame any of the source or direction of my cancer as having been rooted from any one thing in particular, as one will NEVER know. After all, I thought I was at the peak of optimal physical health physical health just over a year ago: living on the beach, feeding my body only the best nutrients, in top muscular condition, etc.
What I AM saying however, is that there had been mounting stress when there should have been peace. Thus, what I’m pleading for with this blog post is a Peace Campaign. What do I mean by Peace Campaign? An effort to:
- Embrace the Power of Positivity, as inspired by the charms in the image above;
- Embody the Grace that the Lotus flower exudes and represents;
- Stop and take time to tune into your inner self;
- Spread JOY!
Let it inspire you to spread peace WHEREVER you are :-).